5.15.2012

Mother's Day Sweet & Sour Experience

I spent part of Mother’s Day 2012 by taking my 89 yr. old mom shopping - something she loves to do but hasn’t been able to for quite awhile, almost a year, because of health issues. I had borrowed a wheel chair from the assisted living facility where she lives in order to make it easier for her to get around – knowing that it would take ten times longer if she had to rely solely on her walker.

I would soon realize how more compassionate people were in dealing with someone who was handicapped/disabled. While browsing throughout the women’s clothing section at Macy’s I had more than the usual attention as numerous sales people came to offer help. We didn’t need much help shopping as I served as my mom’s personal assistant in showing her various items of clothing. As we were about to leave and venture across the way to another part of the store I checked with mom much like one does with a toddler to see if she had to use the restroom. Since we were close to the only restroom on that floor she decided to make a stop.

As I wheeled her down the hallway leading to the bathroom I figured I would get mom as close as possible to the door and then she would have to carefully make her way in. When we got there she was disappointed in hearing that I wasn’t going to wheel her in. As I was telling her that I wasn’t comfortable entering a women’s room without knowing if someone was in there a lady came by and kind of sensed my predicament. I was hoping that she would just go in and see if the coast was clear so to speak for me to enter albeit still feeling a little uncomfortable at the thought. She said not to worry and that she would wheel her in. This lady not only went in with mom but stayed with her the whole time. When they came out she wheeled her all the way to the nearest checkout register seeing we were finished shopping there and had not yet paid for the four items mom purchased. Seeing a line at the checkout register she wheeled her around to the other side and said that she would check her out immediately.

I was so overwhelmed by the attention this woman gave my mom – she went above and beyond what I would expect from someone working at a large nationally known store such as Macy’s. She treated my mom as if she was her own mother.

Off we went to the lingerie department which was on the opposite side of the mall. I felt a little uneasy in the midst of bras, panties, etc. I was the only guy there and felt that I may be intruding on some young woman’s lingerie shopping experience. Mom purchased few things and we proceeded to a checkout counter. On the way there she expressed a desire to look for some shoes so I asked the young saleswoman where I could find shoes. She said that there were across the way, the place where we had just left. This young lady was thoughtful enough to ask if we wanted to pay for the items mom just purchased at the shoe department; the catch was that she would have to accompany us there because we were taking unpaid items out of that store. She offered to come but I thanked her and told her that it wasn’t necessary.

Up until then we had a sweet experience. The sour part would come at the shoe department. The sales girl there acted as if she didn’t want to be there and it took some prodding for her to help mom try a pair of shoes. We soon left without making a purchase. I thought of how different things were when salespeople worked on a commission. They would try very hard to make a sale because they gained in doing so.

Overall the sweet experiences far outweighed that one sour one.

My thoughts from earlier in the day about people being more compassionate to the disabled soon changed while on the way to the underground parking lot. A man coming in saw that I was struggling to get my mom who was still in the wheel chair through two doors and I thought that he would be decent enough to hold one of the doors; the door he was coming in to let me out. Instead he just came in and walked by leaving me to struggle in holding both doors long enough to wheel her out. As I exited I held one of the doors open for two young who were entering. They went right in without even saying thanks.

I was glad to have those two nice experiences earlier on because the others left me wondering about a younger generation that’s been spoiled. Whether it’s intentional or not some seem to lack basic manners – they seem to be too wrapped up in themselves.

Good manners can replace morals. It may be years before anyone knows if what you are doing is right. But if what you are doing is nice, it will be immediately evident. ~P.J. O'Rourke

No comments: