My Three Sons

As Father's Day approaches I have mixed emotions; thinking of my dad who I never met since he died 2 months before I was born and my own adventure into fatherhood.
This year unlike the past ones I am remembering the gift that God gave to me - oh there were trying moments when I didn't think they were gifts - in my three sons. I wish I could say that our lives mirrored the one of the TV show that ran from 1960 to 1972 named My Three Sons. That was a house that was headed by a widowed father, Steve Douglas and I could somehow relate to this as I had to bring up my three sons for those trying teen-age years due to their mom's mental illness. The father figure on that show had the help of "Bub," the boy's live-in maternal grandfather, who five years later would be replaced by his brother, the boy's uncle, Charley.

I had no one living with me to help out with the boys, but I did have family members pitch in at different times with cooking or just taking the boys off my hands for a day or night. My version of Chip, Robbie, and Mike were Gerry, Lee and Dan. It's been a long time since I've watched an episode from My Three Sons but to my recollection the similarities other than some of the things boys get into stop at the makeup of the family of a father and three boys. Their dad seemed to have an executive job and they seemed to live in an affluent or fairly affluent area where I was working my way up from a Postal clerk to Supervisor and eventually a managerial position. We lived in a blue-collar neighborhood of Boston where drugs and crime were a daily slice of life.

My sons were good as they were given a solid foundation from the day they were born and did their best under the circumstances as they grew older. I have often gone back and relived some of the dark moments but today as I was scanning some photos I can see how truly gifted and thankful I am for them.

As I look at this picture of Gerry and Lee, I am reminded of the fierce sibling rivalry that existed between the two. As the first child, Gerry was used to getting all the attention and was ok for awhile when Lee was born. He was very protective of his baby brother. As Lee got older he figured out a way to get more attention and that was at being better than Gerry in many aspects.


They look so innocent here but I remember moments when they would tangle with each other especially when they were competing. Gerry wanted to be the responsible older brother but at times he wasn't allowed to. He could get very stubborn and start to think of ways to get under your skin. This picture on the right will give an indication just by body position of how he would get (hands positioned on hips, eyes looking down, and the position of his upper lip over the bottom).

Four and half years after Gerry was born we were blessed with the arrival of Daniel (Dan). Gerry now shifted his focus on a new little brother. Parenting seemed to be easier when Dan came along as the apprehension that was there for the first all but disappeared with the third. Everyone was more relaxed and Danny benefited from this environment. He now had two older brothers to dawdle over him.

This picture reminded me of how responsible and caring Gerry was when he was young. Here he is teaching his little brother to hit a ball. Dan was like a piece of putty, so easy to manipulate and teach, as he was much calmer and relaxed than the older two. I can almost hear Gerry saying, "OK Dan, keep your eye on the ball," as he carefully tosses it underhand. These two guys would years later be at opposite ends of the spectrum. I got to relive my own version of the parable of the Prodigal Son with these two guys as substitutes (Gerry was the lost sheep while Dan was the good do-bee son).

What I think I'm most thankful for this year is in seeing the harmony that was there early on in their childhood slowly return; slowly seeing the evolving of my oldest as being the responsible one and leading the other two; seeing the hard heart of Gerry soften yet being stern and fair in his dealing with his brothers.

I'm reminded of a positive talk I had with Gerry years ago when in the midst of some of his most trying moments I told him that someday he would achieve something good.

I am so thankful and proud of my three sons. I'm proud to be introduced as Gerry's or Lee's or Danny's father and look forward to one day, the Lord willing, to be a grandfather to one of their children. God gave me the perfect Father's Day gift in each of these three - I thank Him for blessing me thrice.