Annoyed By TV Ads

Memo to Advertising Gurus

I realize that you have various ways to promote and sell products and one of them which really bugs me is to show the same ad over and over ad nauseum. I realize that this gimmick will irritate me to the point that at least I know your product but I'd like to tell you something, IT"S NOT WORKING WITH ME.

God bless Peyton Manning but I've seen more of Peyton Manning hacking all kinds of stuff than I've seen my right hand that it's annoyed me to the point that I either turn the channel or shut the TV off for the minute or two he's on. I'm so annoyed that I don't even know the products he's hacking.

Secondly I'd like to thank you for finally replacing Jared with Peter of The Family Guy as the hacker for Subway. (By the way, did Jared perchance put back all that weight he lost?) Jared never got me to go into a Subway store and I don't know if Peter will either; my annoyance here is with your slogan EAT FRESH.
Everytime I hear your slogan, I ask eat fresh what?

The stuff that you are showing on the screen certainly doesn't look fresh. I eat fresh when I go fishing and cook the fesh fish that I catch. I eat fresh in the summertime when I harvest the crops that grow in my garden. What is it with EAT FRESH?

Are you implying that we eat STALE?

You might need a FRESH slogan.

I'm still trying to find out, WHERE'S THE BEEF, that the old lady kept looking for and I'm still lokking for Mr. Whipple to appear in the supermarket aisle saying DON'T SQUEEZE THE CHARMIN!